Finding the Golden Mean in your life

Its middle October and some are already panicking that the year is almost over. This month is a month I will focus on personal effectiveness to ensure I come closer to my goals and dreams for 2011. For me to go past the mark is as wrong as to fall short-Confucius.
Could you believe that the ideal person is never the best at anything? Our heads are full of delusions about wealth and power that we ran ourselves ragged trying to outdo each other. We spin our wheels until we burn ourselves out and are left hopeless and exhausted. There is great pressure to attain the level of achievement. We want to be the richest most beautiful and most well liked because, these ‘virtuls are glorified. But by indulging our vanity we do ourselves more harm than good.
The only way to achieve sustainable happiness is to practice the Golden Mean. The idea of the Golden Mean has existed for thousands of years, it was at the core of both Eastern and Western philosophy and is central to the teachings of Aristotle. The idea is simple.Every quality has extremes at both ends. The Golden Mean is natural balance between these extremes.
At this harmonious point goodness and beauty are achieved. Allow me to use this example of extreme devotion to athletics verses extreme devotion to music to illustrate this idea. The athlete becomes overly aggressive and ferocious, while the musician becomes overly soft and effeminate. The ideal person is someone who practices both athletics and music in moderation and requires a harmonious mixture of both qualities. Consider an example from modern times that I’m sure everyone has observed. The first person is extremely career driven. Each day she focuses on advancing himself competes mercilessly with her co-workers and flatters his superiors. As a result he has almost no personal life. The second person’s only pursuit is leisure. He likes to spend all his time with friends watching soccer on television or any other activity in pursuit of leisure and fun. Which of the person is superior? Many people would argue for the hard worker. But at second glance her life is rather cold. Her obsession with success has alienated her co-workers and her without a family. She may become rich but will she enjoy it? The second person is no better. He has wasted his life in laziness. He has refused to develop himself and exists as a parasitic leech.
Both persons are worthy of pity.
I think we would all agree the ideal person would be somewhere in between the two people. So how do we find the elusive Golden Mean? The bad news: It takes years of trial and error to get it perfect. The good bit; we can all improve if we try. It all starts with setting the right goals. Whenever you make a goal you need to do it with the right intention. Do not set goals with intent to dominate other people. This type of goal setting is ego-driven and pulls you away from the Mean. Instead try to start with a goal that is between total selfishness and total selflessness.
If you are helping yourself or other people at the same time you can draw motivation from ego-driven side and from the common good. This type of goal setting is effective because whenever you start to lose motivation in one area you can draw from other. The next step to reaching the Golden Mean knowing your limits. You need to know when one more project is going to stress you out. The idea is to maintain balance at all times. You need to police yourself to avoid extremity. If you know when you are inclined to stray you have a head start on achieving balance. Another step to achieving the Golden Mean is being aware of your personal needs. Sure we need money and success, but having good relationship with family and friends are just as important. Whenever you find yourself unhappy take a moment to reflect on the reason. You will likely find that you have drifted over to one extreme and are feeling the consequences.
I know from my life experiences that the Golden Mean is hard to live by but it’s is key to finding your inner confidence.
Next time you find yourself willing to do anything to the best of the best, take a moment to reconsider, you may it is better to be the best ‘’You’’ you can be.
On my recent visit to Zimbabwe I learned a lot about life, one thing I have learned for sure that never Mask your feeling or put on a brave face and attempt to cope alone during demanding times. After I found my Golden Mean No more stresses, no more depressions, I’m happier than ever and I shall stay that way. You too can

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