In many different ways, we as African society must continue to weigh on many social issues as our forefathers did. Polygyny should be condemned from all angles left and right for the fact that it’s not something right in this modern times of ours. With all the nasty illness such as HIV and abuse of woman in our communities no way we should be supporting nor promoting it.
First of all, almost all men already like having as many female partners as possible why we men think it’s our Godly given right to have as many woman as we may want? Why do we complain and became outrageous with the idea of a woman becoming polyandry? What is unfair here that is not unfair for women? Do we men think we are much more human than woman? Do we think love can be shared without jealous? It’s no secret that we can never share our woman with someone else why then we expect woman to? Don’t they have same feelings of affection as us?
They are some of us men who want to hide with the biblical examples and teachings that we men have natural penchant to be with scores of women, those who do must come out straight that they do so to satisfy their sexual vanity other than anything.
Many of such people argue to be given the chance to be given the unhindered chance to keep as many women as their partners but do we really look after or love all these women the same as the next one? It will never happen that a man will love all the woman equally, its human nature to have a favourite one and how do the others feel? In my opinion there are there only to serve that man’s sexual desires, In other words they are that man’s sexual toys. Polygamy doesn’t and will never promote freedom, it rather promotes unfaithfulness because for me unfaithfulness isn’t only going at the back of your woman and bed other ladies but simply pretending to love the other woman as the other when you know very well you don’t.
Everyone wants to be free to associate, choose, decide and so on but such privilege shouldn’t extended to polygamy. If a woman stays in a polygamous relationship or marriage doesn’t mean that she is necessary happy, In most cases it’s about circumstances, In our African societies most women housewives dependent on the man, if so they have limited options and have no choice but to stay in the situation they are not happy in . Why there is no men who ever tell his first wife that he intend to marry multiply women when that man is proposing marriage to that woman ? Why most woman hide from the woman at the beginning that they have other woman? It’s simply because no woman would accept such only a gold-digger would and that alone tells us something is amiss with polygamy.
I seriously disagree with some that polygamy helps prevent or minimize adultery because those who are into it they tend hide the relationship first and only come out when their under the cover of darkness sexually relationship with that woman is expose its only when they make that woman their wife, Isn’t that cheating would they come out if they were not caught? The answer is NO. If a man enjoys having multiple sexual relationships then that means that man will have new sexually relationships every time until his last breathe and imagine how many woman he would have bedded or married in his life time. If one really loves their partner they shouldn’t be temptation to cheat because in my opinion polygamy is desire to fulfil that sexually ego, it’s a sort of addiction to having different kind of woman every week or month and it’s very difficult to treat, But the treatment is abstain from the practice in the first place
Polygamy was part of our Africans culture yes but not only us many other cultures too but times has changed and those other cultures has abandoned this iron age practice so why not us Africans? Long gone are the days of practicing this barbaric form of culture to feel proud, dignified and respected in society , all of us feel proud and dignified and respected if we are financially or academically successful, Tell me In which African society these days you can be regarded as powerful because you have twenty wives? Help me here I don’t know any, which means the practice has become outdated as cassette tapes. We Africans must accept that times changes polygamy was practiced by great men of both the bible and Koran yes, but are these people who cultures are close to the Bible and Koran, of which their Bible and Koran is our daily bread today still practising such ? Don’t know it’s for you to answer.
Yes Abraham had more than one wife. Jacob had more than one wife. David had more than one wife. Solomon had more than one wife. Mohamed had more than one wife but that was then we can’t compare those times to now as I stated earlier times changes, they was times in Africa when presidents would stay in power and did as they wished and it was something acceptable then, but due to times changing its now unacceptable for a president to stay beyond his or her third term, If he or she tries we take to the streets or take up arms.
Polygamy doesn’t reduce the number of unmarried women in society, it increase the number of unhappy women in society and how would a unhappy women raise and groom children who would be productive in society when grown up, when herself she not happy and in situation of a sort of slavery marriage ? It’s not about reducing the number of unmarried woman in society that matters, it’s about having happily married women, If a woman is single and happy I think she much better off than a married unhappy woman in an polygamous relationship, Marrying off woman into polygamous marriages with the hope that that their problems will be solved through these marriages is no different to rounding up every unemployed individual and offer them employment in fields where its proven they will after sometime be treated less human.
We know that it’s a man’s responsibility to provide for the family but when it comes to most polygamous relationships when the man falls out with the woman, so are the children of that certain woman, Most fathers in polygamous relationships can’t even afford to provide for all the children, when if they had one woman they would, so don’t tell me there is a humanitarian part of polygamy instead there is a disastrous part of polygamy where by children have to make ends meet on their own when their own father is alive